Somedays it is hard

...... being the mom

Dont get me wrong most days I am filled with complete joy down to my toes to mother these sweet ones, but somedays...every once in a while it is really hard to be the one

disciplining, wiping, chasing, correcting, listening, redirecting, distracting, helping, and even spanking and getting up a zillion times in the night...

this week seems to be full of those days for me

The kind of days where I fight hard not to lose my temper, I fight hard not to yell, and occasionally I fail at one or both

Michelle Duggar (mother of nineteen) was once asked what was the hardest thing she has experienced having so many children?"

Her reply:       "Keeping up with their hearts"

 

Now, I know she has ten times the children I do, but I know without a doubt already; that keeping up with their hearts is my biggest challenge.

It seems like about the time I understand a new stage and things are going smooth, they change; again.

And of course this goes on forever.

 

Somedays I really wonder what Weston is thinking when he does something completely out of character.

And then I am reminded of something I read this past fall in bible study.

It was this:

"As much as we want to please others and be a light to the world, we need to remember that Jesus is more concerned with what is going on in our children's hearts than He is about how well-behaved they are."

 

This stopped me in my tracks at the time. I was just learning the ins and outs of discilpling an up and coming toddler and I was amazed at how much my drive was from simply wanting Weston to be a nice young, well behaved little boy.

Nights like this...or weeks like this in my case usually leave me up late with a heavy hearted staring failure in the face.

And usually a good cry and some deep prayer time is in order and after both I start to feel some peace and refreshment.

I love this Beth Quinn piece. Not because I am patient, but because I want to be.

Deep in my heart is a momma, wife and woman I am striving to be. One that the Bible instructs and encourages.

One that is patient and loving in times when it is hard to be.

So I got to bed tonight hopeful for tomorrow. For a new day and encouraged by the words of the great Apostle Paul"

"Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus". (ESV)   Philippians 3:13–14
 
 
 
You may be wondering why I would share something so heavy hearted with you and my reason is simply because the few tidbits I shared tonight have deeply encouraged my heart as a mother and woman seeking the Lord and maybe some night when you feel failure stairing you in the face I want you to feel hope and encouragement too.
 
Good night friends.